Four guys, one bedroom

I've managed to get my room back. No, really, I have, and I know that some of you lot are really wondering how I achieved something that can be described as quite impossible. Well I decided on Friday night last week that I was going to sleep in my own bloody room since it was a Friday night and therefore not much harm could come from me sleeping a little late. So when bedtime came, I locked the doors and put on my noise-canceling headphones so I wouldn't be able to hear anyone knocking on my door. Unfortunately, my mom miraculously managed to get my attention and made me open the door to surrender my phone since it was recognized as a potential threat to my sleep. Thankfully, after handing it over I was allowed to sleep in my room once again.

The next day, however, my dad came up with the very creative idea that I might sneak down in the middle of the night when everyone else was having wet dreams to use the computer. This, to a certain extent I shall be forced to agree, is true, but I knew I wasn't going to do that anymore with doomsday just over two weeks to go. With the phone threat eliminated (my mom had since taken away my SIM card when she caught me texting while studying), my dad identified the computer as the only thing left that could compromise my sleep. Now obviously I wasn't going to give up my room without a fight now, was I? So what I did then was go downstairs, pull all the cables out of the damn thing, lug it upstairs and plonk it down in front of the entrance to the master bedroom. Now there was no excuse for them to not let me sleep in my own room. Heh.

On a much lighter note, three of the lads came over to spend the night at my house after trials were over. The aforementioned three were Ganesh, Gabriel and Laveen. I got my dad to bring home the projector since what I wanted to do was watch movies cinema-style, but the other three, it seems, had other ideas. Being the hardcore DoTA freaks they were, all they wanted to do was play that silly game. And the fact that my house had two computers and a laptop made the idea even more appealing. With Gabby's laptop factored in we had four rigs, perfect for a 2v2. But then we had a problem. I had forgotten that the laptop didn't have a mouse, and without one it would be quite impossible to properly control your oh-so-magical hero so as to be able to turn Laveen's character into a chicken.

Given that it was apparently my fault for not remembering the fact that I didn't have enough mice, I was given the task of looking for one of those electronic rodents. So obviously the first thing I would do is go to the neighbours, but the problem was that I didn't know my neighbours very well (I should be ashamed, I know), and the chaps to the right of my house weren't in at the moment, while the house on the left didn't have a doorbell. It was at that point that I remembered that a friend of a friend lived down the road, and therefore there was a chance that she might so kindly lend us a mouse. This is going to be very weird indeed, I thought, and rightly so because I didn't know her very well. Nevertheless, desperate times required desperate measures, so I called up Lynette and requested that she contact her friend who lived down my street, Nicole, to ask her if she could spare us a mouse. After a few suspense-filled moments of waiting, Lynette texted me a positive reply, so Gabby and I went out and walked down the street to retreive the wired rodent. With that, the two ladies become our saviours for the night. The lads extend their thanks, by the way.

With all four rigs up and running, my living room and dining room started to look like a mini-cybercafe. So, let the games begin! It was an MCA-MIC matchup, with Gabby and I on the two main computers in the living room, while Laveen and Ganesh had the ball-burners in the dining room. We played two rounds and were about to play some more when my mom woke up and told us to go to bed. Anyway, I am proud to announce that MCA won 2-nil. Noobs =P

Now you know what Ganesh's hair looks like when it isn't waxed.

After the gaming session I had to figure out how to fit three and a half men into my bedroom. It was then that I decided to do a little improvising my taking out the two sofa cushions (the ones that you sit on) from the huge sofa in my living room and chuck them on the floor to the left of my bed, while the other side got the cushion from a much smaller one upstairs. Oh and there were lots of pillows. Unfortunately, a pillow fight wouldn't have been a good idea at the time. Before going to bed though, we played Chor Tai Ti till about four a.m. in the morning, after which we decided it would be a good idea to get some shut-eye.

We really have a problem with card addiction here. This was taken at 4am in the morning.

Ganesh and I got the bed and since there was only one blanket we had to share it, and I didn't think blanket-sharing was possible until then. Gabby got the floor on my right while Laveen was on Ganesh's left. Now it is worth noting that Gabby here was sleeping directly under the air-conditioner while Laveen would be snoozing at the end of the room where the cold air was least likely to go. And this is why I was completely dumbfounded by the fact that Laveen had snagged the second blanket while all Gabby had to cover the end of his feet was a shirt. The poor sod was so cold that at one time when I woke up in the middle of the night he had himself covered in what looked like ten pillows, while Laveen on the other end complained that he was feeling quite hot throughout the night. Idiots, both of them. I shall now leave you with a rather disturbing picture of Gabby getting sexually assaulted by Ganesh.

You have to wonder why they still bother trying to justify the mythical fact that they're not gay. Just look at the orgasmic smile on Ganesh's face.

I'm on the bloody throne, what the hell do you want?!

My mom thinks that I'm either overconfident or that I just don't really care about how my exams turn out. I, however, beg to differ. Because it's not that I don't care about my academic well being, I do, I really do, it's just that I'm sometimes (or rather most of the time) just too lazy to do anything about it. The mood isn't right most of the time, partly because of the unbearable heat on weekend afternoons, and mostly because of my insatiable addiction to 'carbon hydroxide' (those of you who know me well will know very well what I'm talking about). I have a mild suspicion that it is because of all this that my trial results were rather catastrophic. I got an A for Chemistry (kiasu bastard, I know what you're thinking, but please, wait for me to list down the remaining grades), a C for Pure Math which is completely unacceptable and a C for Physics, and I blame this on the fact that I had the urgent need to empty my bowels halfway through the exam. I'm telling you, this pooping problem of mine is going to cost me dearly. Oh and I failed Further Math, plainly because I didn't study for it. At all.

Now I shall tell you that I've never gotten results this bad before, and the most atrocious grade I've ever been awarded for any exam (I'm not referring to small class/topical tests here, mind you) was a B, and this, I reckon, is partly the reason for my dad's reaction when my mom gave him a description of what my report card looked like. I won't know how he reacted for sure because I wasn't there, but me mom said that he couldn't believe his ears. So obviously something had to be done to ensure that my trial results don't decide to make a surprise reappearance on my REAL exam certificate which Cambridge will so kindly send me all the way from England. I accept this fact, yes, but what I can't accept is that my dad wants me to sleep in HIS room with my mom until my exams are over in June. His reason? My room's got too many distractions, and he reckons that the reason I never get enough sleep is because I keep fiddling with this and mucking about with that until the wee hours in the morning. That, I shall be forced to agree, is true, but I think I won't be doing that any more with my A-Level finals less than a month away. Frankly, though, I think that this is a bit much. I've been sleeping in the master bedroom for two nights now and I miss my bed and my room dearly. Now obviously I won't be able to withstand my mom's hard bed and the inability to toss and turn and jump on my own bed as I please for much longer, so I will have to try very hard to convince my dad to let me sleep in my own bloody room. In any case, I won't be able to sleep as soundly in a bed that isn't my own, and that defeats the his whole purpose of wanting me to sleep in his room doesn't it?

The most ridiculous thing, however, is that he wants my mom to time me every time I pay a visit to my revered loo, simply to ensure that I don't spend more time than an average man takes to empty his bowels. Can you see how ridiculous that is?! I have now been deprived of the luxury pooping in peace. I shall have to sign off here because that's exactly what I've been doing while typing this entire post. Yes, I am currently on the throne. And I have to leave because my arse is starting to hurt.